Orchids are Easy - Honest!

Back in the Victorian days, the owning of orchids was something reserved for only the very rich who paid small fortunes to have rare specimens shipped over from far-away jungles and mountains. Because of this exclusivity, the orchid has gained an unjust reputation for being difficult to keep. Whilst this reputation is true for some more specialist orchids, of which there are estimated to be over 25,000 different species and another 50,000 of orchid hybrids, it would be unfair to accuse all orchids of this.

The most commonly available orchid nowadays is the Phalaenopsis Orchid, also known as 'Moth Orchid' due to the wing-shape that the beautiful petals make. As a result of their ease of hybridising it is impossible to know how many different varieties there are of Phalaenopsis Orchids and unfortunately very few are given their full variety names when sold in garden centres and nurseries which makes it a tad bit annoying for serious orchid growers.

However, not knowing the name of an orchid should not deter you from having a go at keeping one. From my days working at the local garden centre, I constantly heard customers oohing and aahing over the stunning flowers but following it with a "I couldn't possibly keep one of those. They're so exotic looking." Whilst the later of those sentences is true - they are indeed 'so exotic looking' - they are probably the easiest houseplant to grow and keep.

You don't need any fancy glasshouses or propagators to keep a Phalaenopsis happy. All it requires is a bright (but not in direct sunlight) position and to be watered about - and this is usually the bit that scares people - once every three to four weeks. To be honest mine are lucky if they get water once every six to eight weeks!

Most orchids sold in garden centres are grown in clear pots. This is to allow maximum light to reach the roots to enable faster growth. Some 'experts' exclaim that the clear pots must always be visible to ensure a healthy orchid but as far as I'm concerned, so long as the orchid has had a good start to life (and by that I mean if it's already flowering when you get it) then the root system is established enough and the clear pot can be disguised by a more attractive pot cover that fits with your decor more tastefully. Lets face it, the roots of an orchid aren't really it's most attractive attribute. Always make sure though that your orchid has excellent drainage as they HATE sitting in water.

Common concerns that orchid owners would approach me with were:

" the leaves are going yellow" =solution: you're giving it too much water. Allow it to dry out and new leaves should grow through lush and dark green. The existing yellow leaves won't recover so don't expect miracles.

"the roots are sticking out of the pot. Can I cut them off?" =solution: Phalaenopsis roots are aerial which means they do not need soil or growing medium in order to grow. In their natural habit of tropical rainforests, orchids grow high up in the branches of trees, clinging to mosses or other plant types. The roots can, and will, get moisture and nutrients from the air around them and so whilst roots sticking out of pots can be unsightly it is best to leave them to do their thing. If you really don't like them though, and there are enough healthy roots in the pot, then by all means, cut them off - you cruel, heartless person, you!

"there's sticky, cotton-wool-like stuff in the base of the leaves" =solution: What you have there, my friend, is an annoying pest referred to as 'woolly aphid' or 'mealy bug'. It particularly likes a warm, moist environment which means that if you're keeping your orchid in its most favourite conditions, you're most likely to come across these little fellas. Treatment is simple though as a mild infestation can be wiped off with a damp cloth, making certain to get deep into the base of the leaves or for more severe cases, a systemic insecticide can be used. If the orchid is in flower when you spray, trey not to get the insecticide onto the petals. It won't harm the plant but may mottle the flowers and ruin your lovely display.

"the flowers have finished. Now what do I do with it?" =solution: okay, this one is never easy to explain without an actual example to hand to show you but I'll give it a go anyway. If you look closely at the stem that has been flowering you will see 'nodes' (lumpy bits) at intervals up the stem. Got them? Right... now tracking from the top of the stem try to find the 'node' that is directly below where the very first flower was and cut the stem just above that. If you can't work that out, then you can also work up the stem and cut above either the 3rd or 4th 'node'. Once you've cut the stem you then have to practice some patience and, what should happen is, the stem will branch out with a new flower spike from the node below where you cut. Fantastic, huh? More flowers!

Alternatively, if all that care just seems like way too much hard work (and basically if it does -shame on you!) then you can buy a plant just as it is breaking into bloom for usually about £10-£15, depending on the number of branches it has, and just enjoy the flowers while they last. Normally the flowers will last for a minimum of eight weeks (given no care) and more often than not will last for several months at a time. Fantastic value for money if you ask me. Think about it...How much would you spend on a bunch of cut flowers only to have them last for about three weeks if you were lucky?

There's no competition for me. Phalaenopsis orchids everytime please.

The weirdest thing happened last week!

With the sudden dehydration of my plants last week, I began looking into possible reasons for their sorry-looking state and after ruling out the possibility that someone had deliberately poisoned them (why would they anyway? I'm a lovely person!) I settled for the fact that the large trees that the council planted behind my garden for privacy are having a last minute binge-drinking session before the autumn really kicks in and are taking all of the moisture from the ground. Combined with the fact that it hasn't actually rained for nearly four weeks now and the ending result is the smaller plants suffer!

Whilst out there examining my poorly plants and pleading with them to fight for survival, I got whacked on the head by a ridiculously large branch that was overhanging my garden. Not content with killing my plants, the trees were starting on me now!

Well, I wasn't having any of this and so - armed with my Felco secateurs - I promptly chopped off the offending limb and a few others for good measure. As I hacked away at the tree it attempted to fight back by launching large chunks of dead branches down at me. If anyone had walked by at that moment I'm not sure if I'd have been reported for cruelty to trees but it wasn't a pretty fight, all-in-all.

Standing back and admiring my handiwork, I started to take pity on the tree. It is full of dead wood and just looks in a sorry state. despite it only being 20 years old - a mere baby in the tree world.

I decided that I'd contact the council and ask them to have a little look at it and maybe give it some much needed TLC. I penned a letter, sent it off, and three days later received a reply that somebody would come out the following day and that all of the trees (six in total) were scheduled for pruning this Autumn anyway.

Shock Horror!! A prompt reply from the council! What's going on? It's unheard of!

Anyway, the next day came and, sure enough, so did three men armed with chainsaws.

Within an hour they had chopped down the neighbouring tree to mine. I'm hoping that they'd planned to do that and that they got the right tree, but either way, it has made such a difference to my garden - I now have sunlight after 1pm in the afternoon and I have a view.

As for 'my' tree? It's still exactly the same! Oh well, can't expect the council to get it right everytime, can you?!

It's all just a big mess!

Well, the summer has pretty much been and gone (although the lovely sunshine today is very welcome) and my garden is really punishing me for neglecting it over the past few months. As a result, the slugs have moved in and devoured all of my new plants. That Cosmos atrosanguinea that I planted in June? Now just a few woody sticks that I'm hoping and praying will return bigger and stronger next Spring.

Despite the copious amounts of rain that has fallen from the sky recently, it appears that the top of my garden didn't get any and to my dismay, established plants (Hydrangea, Leycesteria and an Asplenium among others) are all heavily wilting though drought. I could've cried when I noticed their shrivelled, dehydrated leaves and immediately ran out with a watering can. Only now, three days on, are they starting to bounce back to life.

I can't wait to let myself loose out there with a pair of secateurs to regain control. It's an absolute mess but I'm determined to leave the last of the flowerheads this year to let them set seed and hopefully get lots more little seedlings in Spring.

Until then, it's off to the local garden centre to search out the latest Spring-Flowering Bulbs that are in store now.